The very early stages of jealousy can be when you go back into your childhood. When another kid took your toys and you just couldn’t take it, your mum loved your other brother more than you and you couldn’t manage to grasp why that’s happening, in school the other kid sitting next to you might have a wonderful schoolbag while you couldn’t manage to get one and so on. Those are natural things that happen in that phase, but if they are carried over into the adult phase. That’s when things get out of hand. REALLY out of hand.

Jealousy eats us up alive, just like the title of this blog entry says. Because when we are jealous what we don’t see or in other words what we don’t want to see is someone else’s happiness, or someone else’s success.

There are lots of ways you can manage how to NOT be jealous. One needs to go deep into their soul to realize that if they are jealous of someone’s success of happiness, then they aren’t doing themselves any favor. The mind would get twisted ideas, and totally work the opposite of your success.

Because in the long run, the jealous person would be busier in feeling sorry for him/herself rather than doing anything constructive. As the time they spend in feeling bad could have been used to make their skills and personality shine like the brightest of stars in the darkest of skies.

Many people confuse envy with jealousy so below is the list of the differences as to how these terms really fit in:-

Jealousy involves:

* Being angry or very suspicious
* Fear of losing something or someone
* Being sad over loss or having self-esteem issues
* Being lonely or very uncertain in a situation
* Not trusting the other person
* Or just being scared of losing a loved one to someone else

Envy involves:

* When one is longing for something / someone
* Having the feelings for inferiority
* Being resentful of circumstances
* A strong desire to “want” a rival’s qualities
* Being motivated to improve in a field

So what is jealousy then

If you see above you will see a certain line between the two terms. But since I am talking about jealousy do you also see what I see? So much of self destruction in each and every line. There is no justification to be jealous of others. Yes, one can be a little scared of losing someone to some other person you are not so much friends with, BUT then again trust is the basic groundwork here.

How not to be jealous at work

• Appreciate other’s work when they succeed
• Be friendly with those you work with
• Do NOT hold back anything that might help someone at work
• Work on your own skills rather than putting down someone else
• Learn to talk only when you feel you have something good to say
• If you are good at what you do, your work will outshine.. but don’t over do it to
  make fun of others who aren’t capable enough
• Everyone is different, maybe what they have is made for them, and what you have is something they want.. thought about that?

How not to be jealous in a relationship

• Build your relationship on trust, because this is very important
• Separate lust from love, because there is a HUGE difference here. The first one leads to destruction if love isn’t involved
• Build up your self-esteem – The more confident you are about yourself, the more worthy you will feel of someone’s love.
• When you are going through a “jealousy” phase do you feel that a rule set by you has been broken? Does your partner know about that rule? If not then it’s time to get a pad out and share what both of you feel comfortable with and what things are to be followed. This will ensure that no further issues come up.
• Do you have a history of “being jealous”? If so then please get in touch with a specialist who can help you with that.

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