The thing that most of us humans enjoy these days and feel as if its the only thing that will make our gatherings enjoyable is talking behind someone’s back. How can we stop from doing this?
It’s said that talking behind someone’s back is like eating your dead brothers flesh. Not only that, but as our Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said once to one of his companions. “I can guarantee you a place in heaven if you can guarantee me two things” when asked what these things were.. he said “One is to control your tongue, and other is your lust (for vulgar acts)”
In one occasion, Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)’s wife Hazrat Aisha (Radhiyallahu-Anha) once said something about someone that this and that person has a short height. The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) in response said “Aisha if at this very moment your tongue is placed in the largest of oceans, the whole ocean would become poison“.
Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said :”Do you know what backbiting is?” They said, “God and His Messenger know best.” He then said, “It is to say something about your brother that he would dislike.” Someone asked him, “But what if what I say is true?” The Messenger of God (pbuh) said, “If what you say about him is true, you are backbiting him, but if it is not true then you have slandered him.”
How many times have you heard someone say:-
- He is black
- He is short
- He is langhda (not being able to walk)
- He is andha (blind)
- He is fat
- He is thin
- I would say it on his face what I am about to tell you
- What i am going to tell you is a secret he or she told me
- You know that friend of yours did this or that…
Why do those people forget who talk like this that if God can make them blind, he can make YOU blind as well. The God who made someone not able to walk properly, can also put YOU in that situation. What’s so special about YOU?
There are ways to get away from this sick habit and stopping others:-
- Leave the group where someone is talking bad about someone
- When you have nothing good to say don’t say it.. will save you from lots of trouble
- When you start to talk to someone about another person, ask yourself.. would you want someone else to talk like this about you?
Backbiting and gossiping, my friend, is the worst habits anyone can ever have. It totally messes our personality, and the way people look at us. Not only that, it’s one of the biggest reasons why some people suffer in life and will suffer in the day of qayamat. It’s said that at the day og judgement, those that talk behind someone’s back will have nails of copper and will be ripping their flesh and face with their hands. That’s how bad it is..
What about you guys n gals.. how do you see backbiting?
September 27th, 2008 at 9:24 pm
انسانی گوشت کے چسکے پڑے وے مجھ سمیت ہماری ساری قوم کو۔یہاں تو وہ حساب ہے کہ مولوی صاحب بھی کہتے ہیں کہ “غیبت کرنا بری بات ہے، اسے دیکھو کتنی غیبت کرتا ہے”
پر ایک بات ہے
بڑا سوادی کام ہے
September 27th, 2008 at 9:36 pm
@ Duffer
That’s the thing.. it’s swadi kaam but one kaam that will take us to the deepest portions of hell .. dua karing ke hum sab iss kaam se parhez karein .. ameen
September 28th, 2008 at 2:16 am
by deepest you mean basement?
basement to thandi hoti hai G
September 28th, 2008 at 5:19 am
@ duffer
I don’t think ke Quran mein kahin bhi hell ka thanda hone ka likha hei ..
September 28th, 2008 at 5:36 am
Very well said by our beloved prophet Muhammed Sallellahu Alaihuwasallam that if we control our tounge and lust then heaven is guaranteed and I guess these are the most indocile among most of us. May Allah give us all a strength to control the lust & tongue..Aameen
-Latest post from masoods blog ..Common Mistakes!
September 28th, 2008 at 10:34 am
Gheebat karna or sunn-na is one the biggest zulam one can do on themsleves, kyonke jo is bimaari ka shikaar hota hai uske liye faqt tabahi hi tabahi hai is zindagi mein bhi and ane wali life mein bhi!
Kam se kam mujhe samajh nahin ati ke Gheebat karne/sunn-ne mein kya maza hai, I find it really sad! And waise be kehte hain na ke If you want to know abt a person, dont listen to what they tell abt them, listen what they have to tell abt others
Take care!
September 28th, 2008 at 11:30 am
Exactly, bilkul sahi kaha Aleena.. very nice..
September 28th, 2008 at 11:30 am
Its in built in our society – nawaala halak mein phansta hai jab tak hum paanch chhai buraiyaan naa kar kein
-Latest post from Asmas blog ..Bomb scare in Faisal Mosque
September 28th, 2008 at 1:52 pm
One thing I detest apart from hypocrisy is backbiting …. Why talk at all about someone else behind thier backs specially if you are convinced you are right about something why not have the guts to speak up in front of them as well.It shows how less confidence you have and are insecure about yourself that you find the necessity to talk ill of others just to appear a better person. I would say makes sense to me to focus on the good in someone and talk good about them behind their back and appreciate them for their strengths in front of them, not only do you learn good, improve on the person you are but you also earn goodwill and blessings then.
Well i dont just say this because I think it sounds good but because I have practised this in life and found that i am more peaceful and happy in my life
-Latest post from Saanjs blog ..The cycle continues?
September 29th, 2008 at 2:41 am
Another beautiful post, Wakas!
Almost all of us are guilty of back-biting in one form or the other. It takes a lot of effort on one’s part to actually stop from doing this hideous act.
It has been my resolution this year to abstain from back-biting as much as I possibly can. Often times, I say things I shouldn’t have said, like commenting on someone’s physical attributes for instance. But when I start to notice that I am saying things like that, I stop right there.
It’s not easy, but not impossible either
Thanks for the beautiful reminder, my brother.
-Latest post from nadias blog ..The Joy Of Eid Shopping
September 29th, 2008 at 8:09 am
@ Asma
Hena sis that’s the thing… it’s encouraged more and more na
@ saanj
Life is more peaceful when not talking of others I guess.. it does work
@ nadia
Thx sis and as you said, we all need to look at the little things that we do.. koi pata nahi kaunsi cheez Allah ko buri lag jaye.. God bless
-Latest post from Wakas Mirs blog ..Backbiting and how it affects us
September 29th, 2008 at 1:11 pm
So true Brother.
!!
But thats the only thing people do when they are in gathering
am really sorry to admit that i do the same thing sometimes but regret for it afterwards..
Am trying it very hard to stop it for once but when there is a huge gathering its usually starts with people telling thing about others behind their back!I took up courage to go up to people and tell them about their habits that are disliked by people a few days ago at college they gave me a very bad look
practicing this type of things a little difficult in societies these days!!
surely if we need Jannat we have to stop back biting and lust!!!
thank you for posting such a good thing so that people would learn about this
wsalaam!
-Latest post from MARIYASs blog ..Heels!!
September 29th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Eid Mubarak!
-Latest post from nadias blog ..Eid Mubarak!