I have come across different types of people in the past few decades. Either it was via radio, or face-to-face interactions in Pakistan, Norway or UK. I must say, the experiences I got were just out of this world since each and every individual I came across taught me something that I needed to learn and which helps me in one way or the other to this time.
I see myself as someone who cares about others and someone who has pain when he sees someone else going through a tough time. I am sure and I hope you are like that as well. For such people, the agony of sitting around someone who is so self-centered that they see nothing else beyond their own nose, is not a comforting feeling.
Here is how you can be sure that you are dealing with a narcissist.
- They will ask you for advice but have already made up their mind
- They will ridicule you in front of others to just score points
- They will make you feel so tiny that you might forget you exist
- They will take credit for things they haven’t done
- They lack the ability to take any criticism
- They will take revenge for something you might have said about them or to them
Where do these people exist?
- They can be your boss
- They can be someone who manages you
- They could be a colleague
- You probably study with them
- Or you most probably sit with them on and off
What to keep in mind when speaking with such people?
- Don’t show that you are affected by their words, because that’s what they feed on
- Don’t waste your most precious words where you try to get empathy from them
- Don’t let them steer you into pouring your heart to them, they don’t care
- If there is something you need to talk to them about, stick to the topic
- Look at them straight in their eyes and don’t joke around, they see it as a weakness
- Say their name when you talk to them, no “bro” or “sis”
- Breathe properly, and practice what you will be saying
I know it’s easier said than done, but I have been through it a lot of times. From bosses that just couldn’t realize that treating their employees is the most important thing to people who just happened to have their name on top of a contract that they felt gave them the edge.
I wish you luck, and remember, be strong and don’t give in. This world is not for the sheep, but if you are thinking of becoming a lion, try not to bite everyone’s head and only use your powers when you need to. Be nice and be kind, because that’s more powerful than anything else!